Pregnant???

Weston and I both thought we would try for baby #3 while he was home on R&R. The timing was just perfect. But a few months ago Weston and I had a talk about him just wanting to stick with the two we already have. I was heart broken, I had been set on trying for a third for a while and we even planed his R&R around the time I we were wanting to try. We concluded that he was just missing home and the kids and I, and He did want to try for another. Well those thoughts have been on my mind since then and it has been hard for me to be gun oh about wanting another. I also know those feeling come from being a single mom for almost a year and not wanting to do that again with 3. But I have always wanted more then 2 so that is what I have been think of. So this week I have been going pee a ton and the last few days I have been dead tired, way more then usual. So I am wondering.... could I be? But it has only been a week and a couple days. it just seems to soon to know, and I am to scared and nervous to take a test. I would be excited and surprised if I was, but maybe sad and a little relieved if I wasn't.

Also selfishly I think I would be a little torn, as much as I loved being pregnant, I am currently in the best shape I have ever been. I like being fit and tone, and that doesn't come easy. I have been working hard this year Weston has been gone to look this good. So I guess we will see in the next week what God has planned for our life. It is in His hands.