Friday, January 2, 2015

Aiden's Birth Story part 3. The end to a long road.

Monday, June 9th came around, my due date I woke up slightly disappointed that no baby had come yet. Nothing that I was doing was speeding up the process of having this child. Weston was sent home early from work because they new it was my due date and I had been having contractions, man did I feel pressure to preform now! I went on with my day just trying my best to get the house clean and do all I could to have everything ready. Weston and I went for a two mile walk that afternoon. I took a nap after we got home, I woke to having some contractions, but they were no biggy. As day got later they got stronger. Went to bed late and managed to sleep till 1 when I woke up to some very real contractions. Did my best to relax between them, they were not super strong, just enough to take my breath away a bit, but I new this was real and Aiden would be arriving soon. I turned on my music and put in my head phones and tried to rest, and see if I could sleep between contractions. No such luck, I got antsy and decided to get up and shower and enjoy the nice warm water. When I got out I decided to wake Weston and inform him that things had started. My contractions where still about 7 to 10 min apart, but I was really hoping and praying that things would speed up and become more intense. It must have been about 2:30am when I went to go wake my mom, after that I went and made myself breakfast. I was so hungry but nothing sounded good, it sucked. I made myself some oatmeal, and while eating it in the kitchen my contractions came down to about 5 min apart. I tried sitting on my yoga ball but it seemed to only make the contractions more intense and they felt longer. So I went and laid down on my bed, my mom and I talked off and on between contractions, but laying down must have slowed them down, cause I managed to take little naps between a couple 15 min gaps. At about 4am my mom decided to go back to bed, I fell back to sleep for 24 min, when I was woken back up by another contraction, then back to sleep again for 36 min. About this time I don't remember looking at the clock much, I think it was about 7ish when I woke again, still only having contractions about 10-15 minutes apart. I stayed in my room, just listening to music and pacing the floor. The contractions had gotten stronger at this point but were still not too close. Weston mentioned going for a walk, but I was so tired and sore it was really the last thing I wanted to do. I continued to rub Essential oils on to help with pain and help with contractions. I kinda remember about 9:30am mentioning that I could not stand this anymore and just wanted this to be started so I could get it over with. I told weston to get his shoes on cause we we're going for a walk to try and get this moving. The circle that makes up our neighborhood reminds me of a high school track. We started our walk out slow only stoping twice the first lap for some intense contractions, by the end of the second lap I thought things were going good, but we came in the house and pretty much walked back out to go again. I told weston they weren't strong enough and had to keep going. So we started our lap going a different way and then came and took our normal loop. When we reached our street, I had to stop for a super strong contraction, I was so excited, I knew things had started to pick up now. About 50 feet later I had another and it was strong, I made it to our driveway and had another one. It was time to go inside and see where these went. I was having contractions every 2-5 minutes now. I positioned my self over my yoga ball that was on my bed and did my labor sway. While my brain was still working I would have Weston come and massage my lower back and hip area. I decided after not to long that getting in a warm shower sounded good. I got in, but every time would have a contraction it got tough to stand, and kneeling on our shower got painful for my knees. So I asked Weston to fill up the tub in the kids bathroom. (Sadly we have no tub) I transferred my wet body to the other bathroom between a contraction. I got in and was enjoying the nice warm water when another contraction started. That tub is so small and shallow I had to be in on my back, so when the contraction started I was in so much pain. Weston tried to pull me up so I could change positions, but it got very difficult to move, that was the only time I started to cry during my labor. That contraction felt like it lasted for ever. It finally ended and I got out. I told weston I was getting hungry, he asked what I wanted and I told him I was craving Mexican. Somehow during this conversation my mom volunteered to go out and get Mexican. Wonderfully we live in NM so it is pretty authentic. :) She and my Dad took the kids out to go get food. I got back to my room and got on all fours on my yoga mat I set up next to my bed. I went back and forth from leaning on my arms to the yoga ball. Breathing deeply during contraction I tried to remember to ask for Weston to help during my lower back pain, but as labor progressed I forgot to voice my thoughts. All of a sudden I got very hot and started to sweat, then I got really nauseous, I got a bowl that I had just incase that were to happen, since I had not eaten yet it was just fluids. I told Weston it had started, I was ready to push and he needed to get ready. During these contractions I really started to get vocal, groaning and moaning. Weston said he could see his head, I pushed and my water broke. That part they call the ring of fire, where the cervix is around the babies head between pushes, I remember this being the most painful part, it wasn't a burning feeling, just painful. This was the only time I screamed really loud and cursed, saying something to the tone of, 'Why did we do this? I must be crazy.' I pushed again and his whole head was out. A lot more fluid came out after this. I asked about the cord, Weston said it looked fine, but then upon closer examination he felt it around Aiden's neck. I asked if he remembered what do? I talked him through it and then all was good. I pushed again getting one shoulder out, Weston told me one more push, you can do it. I looked back with a small glair saying, I had to wait and wasn't ready for another push. I pushed again and got the other shoulder out. At that point I thought he would have just kind of slipped out, like my other two did. But with another scream and push I got him all the way out. Weston caught him as I was concentrating to hard on pushing. He came out a little blueish and had not taken a breath yet, so I had Weston turn him over and rub his back. He started breathing and thats when I turned around and leaned against the yoga ball and put Aiden on my chest. I had Weston go get my Mom from the living room and she helped me get up to my bed. It was over! My hips felt better, my back wasn't it pain anymore, it was incredible!! Aiden just laid on my chest as I rubbed his back, about 5 minutes later I got him to latch on to nurse and that also helped with contracting the uterus and get the placenta out. I had another contraction and it was pretty painful, I kinda ignored it as I was so happy to have Aiden in my arms, the next contraction I remembered I needed to push to get the placenta out. So I pushed the placenta out, my uterus had already started clotting so I had some very large blood clots come out as well. Weston grabbed all that and put it in a bowl I had sitting around ready for it. At that point I was done, happy and oh so hungry! My wonderful mom and husband cleaned me all up and cleaned up the room too. About an hour after birth we clamped and cut the cord. At that time I was able to move more freely with Aiden in my arms. I continued to feed Aiden and then ate my taco's my parents brought home for me. Aiden was weighed at 7 pounds 12 ounces and 19 ¼ inches long. Months ago when I brought my birth and labor plan to my then OB she looked at it and said 'I think of these more like a guide line, they seem to jinxs everything, nothing ever goes they way you plan.' I couldn't be more happy about how things turned out for my husband and I during our unassisted home birth. I was confidant, educated, prepared and excited about the experience.


Aiden's Birth story part 2. The middle :)

FYI- I am not a english major, almost never got great remarks on my English papers, I do not use commas, periods, or quotes accordingly. I did reread this and try my best to correct any errors. I know there are more. Please do not judge me on them. If something is really off please comment below or email me, maybe I missed it. :)

One Sunday while we were at church, I thought about some dreams I had been having. Both very similar, but just about me having Aiden in our home, quickly, and without any issues. Early on in the pregnancy I just thought this was a normal dream and thought nothing of it. But as I continued to have it pretty regularly I began to wonder if there was more to it and if possibly God was trying to tell me something. That morning in church while worshiping (Don't remember the song, but remember it had to do with trust and love) I had those same visions from my dream come to mind, and this over whelming feeling in my heart and soul that these were not just any ol' dream. I heard these words 'Elizabeth, you can have the birth you want and have prayed for. I have made you in a way that this is possible. I have blessed you with this pregnancy and you can have a pain free birth, without issues and no complications. As you worship me in church, worship me and talk to me during your labor. I will guide you through each step. I love you and I know you can do this.' I cried as I stood there in service, feeling loved and a conformation for what I wanted. I still needed to look into how we were planning to do this, we couldn't afford to pay for a midwife out of pocket, insurance wasn't paying for it, and the new birthing center that just opened had not had all there insurance coverage taken care of yet, and our insurance said it could take 6-9 months till the paper work was all done. I continued to pray and ask what we were to do. I still had no desire to go to the hospital, and even if I did it all myself, (no dr. around) I new there was some hospital policies I didn't want. In March I continued to have these visions of my birth and God telling me I could do it, I was safe and so was Aiden. While trying to dicuss all this with Weston one Sunday, about all the things I had going through my mind, all he had on his mind was finances and how we just could afford a midwife. He couldn't imagine doing all alone. I was so frustrated by him only seeing it one way. My way of coping is listening to music doing some sort of house work and not talking to him, that way he knows I am upset at him. After about only a half hour he came out to the yard where I was pulling weeds and he listened to my thoughts with a more open mind. I told him I wanted to do this all by ourselves, I knew we didn't have the money and I wasn't asking him do go into debt to birth this baby. We talked about what doing it alone really meant and what we would have to do and know to do this properly. He agreed that he was on board and we could try doing an unassisted home birth. Over the next few weeks, I really saw that Weston was not completely on board and was pretty nervous about the whole thing. He was worried about the 'what ifs' and all the things he could not handle. So I started learning about all the 'what ifs' so that he wouldn't need to be worried. I learned about shoulder dystocia, neonatal CPR, postpartum hemorrhage, checking to make sure the placenta is whole and intact, what is an appropriate amount of blood to loose after birth, what to look for when the amniotic fluid comes out, how to clamp the chord, and what if that chord is tied around neck. I refreshed my memory about birthing positions and ways to help with pain. I had a stack of bible verses and quotes I printed up and had next to my bed for times of doubt. I felt so confidant in my choice and my ability that I had no worries, but I had to get my wonderful husband on the same page. After learning about all these things and sharing them with him I started to see him become more comfortable. I asked him to watch non scary home birth videos on YouTube so he could be refreshed with birth again. I prayed daily that God would put on his heart the same feeling and knowledge He had given me. That if that this was truly the way and the path God had set for us that we would continue to know what to do, and if was not, and I was putting my desires ahead of God's that I would be convicted about my choice and together we would know what to do. After I had heard that he had told his co workers that we were having a home birth, I knew he was on board fully and I didn't have to worry about him feeling timid at the birth. God had worked out everything along the way, each step was protected by his mighty hands. In May I ordered my home birthing kit and continued to clean house put our bedroom in order with all the things I wanted to have at hand. I had not seen a Dr or OB since February because of our insurance issues, so in mid May I went to see my regular Dr. just to confirm that all was good and I was ready for the birth and in tip top shape. I did not inform her that I had planned on doing a home birth because I knew she would have to tell me that she advised against it, all Dr. do. I was all good to go. The next weekend we went camping at 38 weeks pregnant. That following weekend Weston had a business trip out of state, so I asked my parents to come early incase I needed them. Weston and I agreed that if I went into labor while we was gone best course of action would be to go to the hospital and we would be there as soon as he could. I was really hoping and praying Adien would come greet us June 3rd, one week before his due date. But that day came and went. My parents where here and enjoying their time with their grandkids, but I was getting anxious and wondering what this next week would bring. Both of our other kids where one week later then their estimated due date, I really didn't want to wait till June 16th to have him, I didn't want to be late again. We were pretty occupied and stayed busy so the time went fast. Saturday June 7th I started having contractions, but they were about 30 min apart and I wasn't sure if they were going to get any closer. I rubbed Clary sage over my lower belly almost every hour to try and make things progress. By 7 that night they had moved to 15 min apart, I continued to pray that things would speed up that night and I would shortly go into labor. No luck, I woke up Sunday morning feeling refreshed but slightly disappointed. I still would have contractions, but very far apart. I would remind myself of a quote I read in a book 'the more false labor you have, the quicker real labor will go' So I tried to stay focused on that, my body was getting ready, and soon my baby would be out. Mind you the people who I would encounter, reminding me that I could still go another two to three weeks were really not helping me. I was feeling full of energy and didn't want to sit still, so after church I convinced my family to go on a hike. My mother looked at me like I was crazy, 'You wanna have this baby on the mountain do you?' she said to me while we were going up. It was a fun and beautiful afternoon but nothing came of it immediately. I remember my husband and I going out for a walk that evening with the dog and him commenting on how he wished Aiden would come soon too, other wise if I pass my due date I am going to get super cranky. Great, feeling the love now. Part 3 click here.

Aiden's Birth Story. Part 1. The long road.

FYI- I am not a english major, almost never got great remarks on my English papers, I do not use commas, periods, or quotes accordingly. I did reread this and try my best to correct any errors. I know there are more. Please do not judge me on them. If something is really off please comment below or email me, maybe I missed it. :)

Family pictures just before we found out. 

For me, my birth story started almost three years ago. When my husband was deployed during 2010-2011 we had talked about trying to expand our little family when he returned home. His 2 week R&R just happened to be prefect timing to try to get pregnant. We had a wonderful vacation and time together as a family. I got pregnant! But shortly after he left to go back, I had a miscarriage. I was heart broken. I was so sad, I felt as if I had lost a great love, a child I had been loving for months, not days. I was so surprised about how deeply broken I was feeling. It wasn't to much longer till my husband came home for good, we talked about what had happened and decided that since he had been gone for a year maybe we should just spend some time together as a family the way it was. Almost another year went by, spring of 2012 we were moving from the East coast to the South west. I had a busy summer, of flying home, getting our new home put together, and then driving back to TN to be with my best friend while she had her new baby girl. When the kids and I returned I told my husband that I still had a desire to have more kids and wanted to try again for a baby. So that August we began to try a conceive again. I thought for sure it wouldn’t take us long, as it never took long in the past. Between August and June of 2013 I had three miscarriages. Those months for me where awful, I was torn apart each time I heard about a friend getting pregnant, I cried many times and even became jealous of family and friends having more babies then me. I came to understand the feelings of those friends I had, that could not get pregnant and had been trying for years longer then me. The heart break that they felt and the many nights they must have cried them selves to sleep, that longing desire to be a parent that is never had never been filled. I remember very distinctively my last miscarriage, Erica had woken both my husband and I up in the middle of the night because she had thrown up, We went to clean it up and I felt very uneasy all of a sudden, I felt as if my heart had sank. I ran to the bathroom and had sadly realized what had happened. I tried to keep it together, and push my feeling aside, as if there was nothing was wrong and I was ok. I helped finish cleaning and put the kids back to bed, but when I went back to bed, I fell apart and cried. At the time husband put his hand on my shoulder, but I wanted much more, I felt alone and broken, unable to do the one thing my body was supposed to do. I couldn't take it any longer, I wanted the pain, the desire and the longing for more to be gone. As I cried, I prayed quietly to myself, asking God to take it all away. I didn't want it any longer, I wanted to be free from the pain I was constantly feeling. Of course it wasn’t instantly gone, as the days and weeks went on I felt better and lighter in my sprit. The desire to have more children was still in my heart, but the pain I would get from seeing others announce their joy was gone. In July I decided to go talk to my Dr and find out if there was anything causing me to not get pregnant. We took a blood test and a urine sample so that they could test for any possible factors. Two weeks later at my next check up she told me, You are a very healthy young lady and all my tests came back negative for any issues and for a woman in a monogamous relationship I have no idea what is causing this inability to get pregnant. So she recommended I go to a specialist. I would have to drive over an hour one way to see a specialist, so we thought we would wait till after our summer vacation to make any decisions. Later that summer the kids, my Dad, and I drove home to spend a month with family and friends, my husband would join us later. One day while at church with my parents, I ended up talking to our pastor about what we had been through and how I was feeling, we prayed together and I went on my with my Sunday, not really think much of it, as it had been a long journey and I guess my Faith wasn't so strong to think that this one prayer was going to make much of a difference. I went and picked my husband up at the airport for our last week home, it had been three weeks since we had seen each other so we spent some time together alone, and then got ready for our kids birthday party the next day. September 18th we had family pictures with both sides of our families. I had this kinda painful crampy stomache ache that night, a trigger went off in my head and I knew something special was going on in my body. My son had got sick with a nasty bug that made him loose his voice, and by the end of the week when we were getting ready to pack up to drive back home, the bug had gotten to us all, I was the last one and the kids seemed to already be on the mend. 48 hours later we were back home, all happy but very tired. A week later I was still feeling off, stuffy, tired, coughy, just not myself. Thought it was strange that I was still feeling sick when everyone else had quickly gotten over what they had. In my mind I was already thinking and hoping about what it could be, but I didn't want to feel that pain again if I was just getting my hopes up for something that wasn't real, so I kept my feelings to myself. I still had another two weeks till I could even take a test to find out. (I have long cycles) So each week that went by felt like forever, just waiting to see if I would start my period, maybe have another miscarriage or wait long enough to see a positive test result. October 1st came around and though I was trying my hardest to wait one more day My husband talked me into taking the pregnancy test that night before bed, and well of course you know what the results were! I was so thrilled to see that positive pregnancy stick.

I started the process of getting my Dr. apointments and finding an OB/gyn. Since my PCM couldn't deliver my baby, at the time I decided to find a physician who could. I went on the search for someone who would let me labor and deliver the way I wanted, plus understood why I was making some choices about shots, delayed cord cutting, skin to skin contact, no pitocin, etc.. While looking for an OB I was also looking into hiring a midwife, because I had a desire to have a home birth. It was not easy figuring them out, and my insurance coverage. After much frustration I found out my insurance would not pay for any midwife that did home births here in Santa fe. So in October I started seeing a highly recommended OB here in town that had the reputation of being very natural and open to new medical information. At that time I was only being seen once a month, but by January I already knew this was not the right match for me. I felt like I was being looked down upon, treated like a new mom, and the things I asked to take place were 'unethical'. So I was on another journey to find out what I should do. About three week later I found out our insurance wasn't covering the OB I was seeing, so I canceled my next apt. with the OB and held off until I new what to do. (Long story, not needed for this story) Part 2 click here
Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...