Monday, November 7, 2011

My brain hurts.

I have so many things on my mind this week, I just really want a break. Lets see, if I sound negative and like I am venting, please just let me. I think a list would let it come across better.

1. We suddenly out of the blue got orders. If your not military, it means we are leaving here, but don't know where to yet. In March Weston goes to school for recruiting. I don't even know what to think about this. when ever I start to think about it I get knots in my stomach and start to fret.

2. I am hormonal this week. I think this needs no explanation.

3. Have you ever felt like you are constantly being over looked? Well lately I feel that way. I have a photography business that I have been trying to grow for months, and have yet to go anywhere. Am I doing something wrong? I am still an amateur but my cost reflects that and I believe they are very reasonable. Have you looked at how much it costs to get your picture taken lately? I had my first paying job in months, but I was unable to keep the shoot as I already had a previous out of town engagement. in just one year I have really seen my pictures improve and that make me so happy.

4. I can't wait till my son goes to school next year!! Having both my kids home right now is really making me nuts. He asks all the time if he can play with his friends, but all his friends are in school. He is 5 but did not get into the state funded pre K program. He has so much energy and with all the other things I do I don't know how other moms do it. Cleaning a house and having kids seems like a full time job to me. how do I get anything else done with out pushing my kids aside?

5. Maybe it is because of the above, but I have not felt like I want to have another baby, at least not any time soon. Nothing against the other moms I know, there babies are all great, but whenever I see a baby cry or fuss, want food or poop, I just think to myself how I don't want to do that again right now. Living on a half nights sleep, waking to the slightest little moan or peep. My husband and I have talked about adopting in the past, and I just keep having that on my heart more and more, like I would like it to happen sooner rather then later.

Just what is on my mind. Please keep me in your prayers.

Please join me as I start this on the 14th. you will be able to link up with your blog.

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